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All of us are in contact with other people in nearly every aspect of our life. Most of these relationships are just as friends or acquaintances and we usually have only a few really close relationships. These are often with your family, girlfriend or boyfriend or a close friend. Most people need other people - to feel loved and to love and to share good and bad times with. All relationships have difficult times but when a close relationship starts to go wrong or one partner wants to end it, this can make you feel low, anxious and as if you have no control over your life anymore.
What can you do?
- Remember most disagreements are caused because people care for each other.
- Decide what you think is causing the problems.
- Talk to the other person and tell them how you feel.
- If you find talking difficult, try writing it down.
- Listen to them and try to understand their point of view.
- Try to find a solution which you can both agree on, this may not be easy and both of you will not get everything they want
- If you cannot find a solution - keep trying.
- It might be hard to do but try to keep talking.
- Talk to someone you trust about your problems.
- Contact one of the helping agencies in your area as sometimes talking to someone who is not involved helps.
Perhaps you are worried about your parent's relationship or they are separated or getting divorced.
This can be really tough on you. Arguments, bickering or long periods of silence may make you feel as if your parents are tearing you apart. You may feel confused, angry or guilty. You almost certainly feel frightened or unsure of what the future holds. These feelings are perfectly normal.
- Try not to take sides.
- Don't blame yourself for what has happened.
- Don't act as a go-between or try to sort out their problems - they must do that for themselves.
- Talk to other relatives or friends about how you feel.
Helping agencies:
Relate
Relationship counselling
Phone 028 9032 3454 or visit www.relateni.org
Relate (Derry)
4/6 Strand Road
L' Derry
Phone 028 7137 1502
Relate Teen
Counselling for you if your parents are having marriage difficulties
Phone 028 9032 3454 or visit www.relateni.org
Parents Advice Centre
Counselling services for parents and children over 13 years
Helpline: FreePhone 0808 8010722 or visit www.pachelp.org
Aisling centre
Individual, couple & family counselling covering a range of issues
37 Darling Street
Enniskillen BT74 7DP
Phone 028 6632 5184
Accord
Relationship Counselling
Parochial Centre
48 Brook Street
Omagh
Phone 028 8224 2439
Accord
Catholic marriage core service
Pastoral centre
48 Bishops Street
Derry
Phone 028 7136 2475
Tara Centre
Individual, couple and family counselling covering a range of issues
11 Holmview Terrace
Omagh
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